Do not label them: When a child is labeled as shy or not outgoing, they start to think of themselves as shy or not outgoing. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy in that they will learn shy and withdrawn behavior. If an adult mentions that your child is shy within their hearing, counter act it by saying something like, "She is actually really outgoing around people she knows." Your child will hear this and believe it because she looks up to you.

Tell you child about your experiences: If your child feels bad about being shy, they may enter a cycle of becoming less and less confident and having lower self-esteem. Counter this negative effect by telling them about your experiences when you were bashful. Your child will feel better about her own shy behavior if she knows mom or dad has been shy in the past and is now a confident person. This will also teach them that it is okay to be shy and that they can work to overcome the behavior if they want to be different.

Show empathy: When your child feels afraid to interact with others, show empathy to her. When you show empathy to your child, they can start to explore their emotions and what is causing them so they can learn to control them and overcome their fears. You give them a safe environment to open up and become their authentic self.

Explain the benefits of outgoing behavior: If your child is making an effort to make friends and be a little more outgoing, it would be a good time to explain the benefits of outgoing behavior so that if they fail the first time, they won't shut down. Tell them the immediate benefits like being able to make new friends, having more fun with other kids, excelling in school, etc. Also explain the long term benefits if your child is old enough to grasp the concept of behavior now will shaper her future.

Be your child's example: Children learn best from their parents' examples rather than their words. If you want to have an outgoing child, you must be outgoing yourself. Invite friends over, talk to people when waiting in line, and speak to children your child's age and get involved in their activities. The more you interact with people and show your child a positive example of outgoing behavior, the more they will respond in kind.

Set behavior goals: Help your child set goals to a more outgoing attitude. If your child really has a hard time talking to new people, you can help her set a goal as simple as saying one word to a new person everyday. If she can get in the habit of saying high and smiling at a new person everyday, she will feel enabled to do more. Keep track of her progress and get your child excited about her new behavior.

Reward your child: When you see your child doing anything bold or outgoing, acknowledge and reward them. A reward can be a huge motivator for a child to act more outgoing. Praise, a special treat, stickers, and activities your child loves can all serve to keep them on track to get over being shy and getting out there to make new friends.