Parenting Articles

When you have children, creating bonds with them from a very young age is important. Most parents want to be able to talk with their kids especially as the children get older. Creating lasting bonds with your children needs to happen at a very young age. This means begin when they are just born. Some say even start bonding when your children are in the womb. The earlier the better if you want the bonds you form to endure over a long period of time.

There are three main keys to creating bonds with your children at a very young age. The first is to have an open communication with your children. The second key is to love them unconditionally and show it often. The third key is to be active with your young children. The order of importance for these keys is dependant on individual families and different times of life. Adjustments will most likely need to be made with your children through out their young lives.

So to begin with, communication will help you create bonds with your children from a very young age. Some people think that you shouldn't talk to babies because they cannot talk back or they can't understand what you are saying. This is not true and babies should be talked to at a very young age. Talk to your children in an adult voice. They won't think that you are trying to make them think they cannot understand what it is you are doing.

"Creating bonds with your children from a very young age" »

Posted by K at 07:35 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

There is perhaps no greater interpersonal challenge than the "blending" of a new family. With over 50% of all marriages ending in divorce and a significant number of those people then remarrying a family complete with several step-siblings is not uncommon. Tensions can mount quickly when members of two different families then come together to establish a new household. Traditions, rules and even everyday habits will be vastly different and can all be points of dispute between family members. But there is no need to despair with a lot of patience, some flexibility and creativity step siblings can end up co-existing peacefully and yes even end up being friends! Here are some tips on how to get along with step siblings.

 Understanding-It is crucial to understand that differences will arise between step siblings. Too often during the romance of a wedding, family members are unwilling to acknowledge what the reality of a new family and new household will bring. If it is possible it is important for all family members to meet together informally or formally (with a counselor or clergy) to discuss expectations of the new family. This can give everyone a chance to communicate their needs and desires before the new family has all moved in together.

"How to get along with step siblings" »

Posted by K at 07:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

All relationships require work and commitment. This is never truer than when considering the relationship between a step parent and child. With over 50% of marriages failing in the United States the blended family has become a modern day reality. The "blending" of a new family can be difficult and time consuming but when approached with patience and tolerance can yield wonderful rewards for all involved. The good news is whether you are a child, teen or even an adult looking to form a relationship with a step parent it can be done successfully! Here are some tips on how to form a relationship with a step parent.

 Remember it takes time to form a lasting relationship. Even if things have gone smoothly during the courtship and wedding of any two people this is no guarantee that an immediate bond will be formed between the step parent and step child. It is important that all parties involved understand that a deep and lasting relationship will take time and involve shared experiences and memories.

"How to form a relationship with a step parent" »

Posted by K at 07:25 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Everyone knows that teenagers are hard to deal with sometimes. But what can you do if your teen won't even talk to you?

Remember back to when you were a teenager. Life was hard, your parents were just out to get you, and you hated school.

Now think about how you would've liked to have been treated. Of course we can't give our teens everything they want but treating them with respect is a big step.

Teenagers come in all different types. There are some who are a little rebellious, some who are rebellious and don't like talking to you but they will if they have to, and those who won't talk to you at all.

To get your teen to talk to you or even to understand her and get inside her head try to follow these tips. No matter what type of teen you have these will work.

"How to relate to an estranged teenager" »

Posted by K at 07:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Let's face it: we are all really, really, really busy. None of us have any free time. We all have an impossible amount of stuff that we have to get done every single day. Maybe you have a spouse, kids, a full time job, you're a student, family with familial demands, your own hobbies and responsibilities, and more. To be involved in all of these things is not unusual-rather, it's pretty typical. And with all of these demands on our time and all of these different things that we need to get done, it is really easy to let other people-our friendships-be the first thing that we drop. It seems like they don't have to get done, unlike that major project for work. But you can learn how to balance your job and your other responsibilities in your life and your friends by learning how to juggle your tasks, balance your time, and making your friendships more of a priority. Just follow these easy tips to make your friendships more of a priority.
Tips for finding time with friends when you are busy

Begin by rethinking your life priorities. What is really most important to you? What do you care the most about? Is it really, honestly your job? Or is it your family or your friends? Your hobbies? Whatever it is, make an honest list of what is most important to you and what you care the most about.

"How to find time with friends when you are busy" »

Posted by K at 07:30 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Many parents despair of ever creating close bonds with their children. So much time is spent just doing everyday things that it seems that parents and children never get to know each other. Think about how you and your family spend your day. How much time do you spend in the car driving your kids to their various activities? How much time, after school, do your kids spend involved in activities such as sports, art classes, dance classes, and more, with people other than family members? How many times in the past week have you all sat down together for dinner as a family? How much time have you spent together as a family-other than in the car, running from destination to destination?

It's getting easier and easier for families and family members to become more and more distant. Parents have to spend a lot of time at work just to make ends meet in today's suffering economy. Kids are involved in more and more extracurricular activities, and spend less and less time with their families. Hardly any families spend time together eating dinner as a whole family any more. Add in the stress experienced by parents and kids and they strive to succeed at both work and at school, and you have a family that is really not a whole lot more than a bunch of strangers who happen to live in the same house, instead of a family that is made up of friends.

While this particular picture does make the situation sound awfully bleak, you don't have to despair and give up hope. It is possible to build, to strengthen, and to maintain bonds of friendship within your family. However, in order to build bonds of friendship within your family, you are going to have to be willing to give to your family that most precious of commodities today: your time.

"How to create close bonds with your children" »

Posted by K at 07:45 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Getting along with an ex-spouse for the kids' sake is important in raising a happy and healthy family. Children do not need to be exposed to anger and hurtful words their whole life. Getting along and being civil to one another can give children a completely different childhood experience. Isn't it worth sacrificing a little pride for the happiness of your children?

Resolve your differences
Getting along with an ex-spouse for the kids' sake may be one of the hardest things you do, but it won't go without reward. If you are divorced and have kids, set your differences aside for the sake of the child. Children are very sensitive, no matter the age. Don't emotionally hurt your child by using them as an object to fight over. You hurt more than just your ex-spouse, you hurt your child also. Try really hard not to say anything negative about your ex around your children. Both people have to come to terms on the situation. If one person is willing and the other isn't, you will never be able to resolve your conflicts. Consider getting a go-between if you can't talk without yelling. Agree to disagree and then move on. Nothing good comes out of trying to prove one or the other is "right." Your ex is their other parent and they deserve to love them for who they are. Don't take that away from them.

"Getting along with an ex-spouse for the kids' sake" »

Posted by K at 07:05 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

When you have problems in your relationship, it is easy to start placing blame. However, it is not healthy, especially not if you want the relationship to last very long. It does not matter why you are placing blame, it is not a good idea.

So, next time you find yourself thinking any of the following, stop yourself and follow the steps for how to stop placing blame:

"How to stop placing blame in your relationship problems" »

Posted by DF at 07:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

One of the most important things to help create a happy home that is conducive to child development is to make your house a place where your children can feel safe and loved. Creating this safe haven is essentially important to the happiness of your children, and can be difficult sometimes to create. The following are a few tips that will help you to make your home a safe haven.
Even in the most mature and well-developed married relationships there are times when you and your spouse will not agree. This can be really difficult, especially when you have to worry about setting a good example for your children, and keeping them feeling secure in the fact that you love your spouse. The number one tip to help make your home a safe haven is: Do not fight with your spouse in front of your children! No matter what you feel needs to be said between the two of you, it can wait until later when you are in private. If you need to have a conversation about something sensitive and possibly hurtful, do not do this in front of your children. Doing so can cause an incredible amount of stress on your kids. If will make them feel insecure and unhappy. The fastest way to take away the safety and security that your children feel in your home is to exchange hurtful words between the two members of your family who are supposed to be solid and loving. It's true that no one is perfect, but if you are attempting to make your home a safe haven, do not exchange hateful words with your spouse in front of them. Doing so will make your children feel that they are not loved, and it will cause them to fight more often with you and with one another. By speaking in a disrespectful manner around your children, you are teaching them to do the same.

"How to make your home a safe haven" »

Posted by DF at 07:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

When you have a toddler who is very clingy, it can be one of the most difficult things to handle. It's really hard to decide how to deal with this situation. You want to help your child become more independent, and have your freedom, while making sure that you're not hurting them emotionally. It can be really hard to balance these two things. The last thing you want to do is make your child feel that they are not loved while attempting to give them a sense of self-assurance. It's very important that your child be independent. If they don't know how to let you go, they will have a hard time doing this later in life as well, when it's important for them to do things on their own.
1. One of the best ways to help your child develop independence and become less clingy is to make sure that you start young. So many couples decide not to attempt leaving their children with a babysitter until after they are already one or two years old. It can be scary to leave your child with someone else, especially wen they are little. Although this is difficult, it's important to do so. Find someone that you really trust, either a close friend or family member, and take the night away. Not only will it be good to have some time to yourself, but it will help your child to develop independence of their own. If you start leaving your children with trusted people who love them when they are young, it is much more likely that they will never get into feeling clingy or emotional when you leave them.

"How to help your toddler become more independent, less clingy" »

Posted by DF at 07:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Having love and affection for your children is something that all parents desire. There is an automatic bond between parents and children that comes inherently with this special relationship, but there are always room for improvement. You should constantly be looking for ways to cherish your children more and to help them feel more loved. Here are some tips on how to gain more of these loving feelings towards one another.

"Ways to cherish your children, and help them feel loved" »

Posted by DF at 07:13 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

A helpful tool in avoiding "Mom Burnout" is learning the ability to "compartmentalize"; in other words, to be "100 % there" in whatever activity is at hand. When these activities include the children and their activities or needs, time spent at the office or other obligations, concentrate on the immediate; understanding that you have set aside a specific time each day for yourself alone. Whether first thing in the morning or later at night when the children are settled in; to literally "make an appointment" with oneself each day - even if only for 20 minutes - to take a bubble bath, practice yoga or just simply enjoy "quiet time" will help to avoid burnout, as well as renew strength and spirit

"Avoiding Mom Burnout" »

Posted by K at 01:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

If you're like most people, when someone asks you to do them a favor or requests your help, you say yes when you really mean NO. Within minutes you probably feel stressed, depressed, resentful, or angry with yourself or with the person who's imposing on you.

Saying NO is a learned skill that transforms how you think about requests and puts an end to excessive people-pleasing.

The five steps below from The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It--And Mean It will hone your ability to turn down those who take advantage of your good nature. As soon as you begin to apply them, you will start to feel justified saying NO and will do so without offending and without feeling guilty. You won't be able to say NO to everything asked of you, nor will you want to, but you don't have to be an ever-accommodating yes-person to be loved, respected, and admired. And, possibly for the first time in years, you'll stop feeling over-extended, overworked, and overwhelmed.

"Harness the Power of NO & Take Back Your Life" »

Posted by K at 12:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

If three of these sounds vaguely like you, it's likely that your children turn you into a yes-person quite easily.
1. At least one room in your home looks like a toy store.
2. At any given hour the couch doubles as a trampoline, a wrestling mat, a hiding place or arts and crafts center.
3. Your child wears his Halloween costume to school in February.
4. You're on a first-name basis with the workers at McDonald's.
5. Your child has everything her best friend has.
6. Your six-year-old stays up so late that he can fill you in on Jay Leno's monologue from the night before.
7. Your daughter's last birthday party was more elaborate than your wedding.
8. You have three dogs, two kittens, and a parakeet who all hang out around the fish tank.
9. You spend most Saturday evenings in the movie theatre parking lot waiting for your children and their friends.
10. You spend Sunday evenings writing history reports and crafting science projects you found out about during dinner.
11. The text messaging charges are bigger than your monthly cell phone fee.
12. Your child's band equipment takes up both parking spaces in the garage.

How did you score? Hmmm. It's probably time to take stock and learn to say no.

"Are You a Yes-Parent?" »

Posted by K at 12:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Parents can often be frustrated by their kids' unwillingness
to share their lives with them. Whether your kids are
toddlers or teens, there will be times when it's difficult
to "break through" and find out what's really going on.
Here are ten ideas on how to create opportunities for your
kids to open up and share their lives with you.

"10 Ways to Get Your Kids to Talk to You" »

Posted by S at 10:29 AM | Permalink

People tend to think that being a stay at home parent means you have
time to sit in front of the TV all day, but anyone who has tried it
knows better. Staying at home means getting up early enough to get the
kids to school, take care of any children not yet in school, clean the
house, prepare meals, get the children to activities, etc. It's not an
easy or leisurely life.

The first thing to think about are your goals. What do you need to get
done each day and what do you want to get done?

"Time Management for Stay at Home Parents" »

Posted by S at 09:50 AM | Permalink

Paula’s last child had just gone off to college and Paula was struggling with a deep inner emptiness. While she knew this day was coming, she was not really prepared for the intense hollowness that welled up within. After all, she had a life of her own. Her work as an occupational therapist, which she had gone back to after all her three children were in school, was fulfilling to her. She was fortunate in having been able to schedule her time to be home when her children came home from school so she could take them to their various activities. Paula had been a loving and devoted mother and was very proud of her children. She had been looking forward to this time for herself and her husband, but now that it was here, Paula felt lost.

It’s not that she didn’t have things she loved to do. She was a talented and athletic woman and had many creative and physical activities that she enjoyed. She and her husband had a good relationship with a wide circle of friends they often spent social time with. So, why this emptiness?

Paula sought my help when she realized that she was slipping into depression.

“I just can’t figure out what’s wrong,” she stated in our first session together. “My marriage is fine, my work is fine, I have lots of friends and activities I enjoy. I don’t understand why I’m feeling so unhappy.”

"Empty Nest Syndrome" »

Posted by Angie at 03:03 PM | Permalink

Ever feel overwhelmed by all the papers, notices, artwork, and other items your kids bring home from school? Don’t be a pack rat!! We’ll show you how to “Trap the R-A-T” (RETAIN, ACT, THROW)

1. School flyers: Nearly every day, your child brings home flyers announcing some school activity, bake sale, field trip, or other such notices. Unfortunately, these notices tend to pile up unless acted upon. As soon as practicable, read the flyers and perform the following R.A.T. exercise.

RETAIN: All school flyers that you need to keep (class lists with phone numbers, emergency procedures, etc.)

ACT: Make sure you have your calendar while reviewing the flyers, and mark any important dates. Once you mark the date, you should be able to “throw.”

THROW: Anything you suspect you won’t need in the future. Don’t be afraid to throw, as you can always go back to the school and ask about the content of the flyer if necessary. There should be approximately a 4 to 1 ratio of “throw” to “retain.”

2. Art Work:While it would be great to be able to keep all of your childrens’ artwork in perpetuity, most of us don’t have enough room in the house!! I recommend that you follow the 3 “F” rule.

FRAME: Some outstanding pieces of artwork deserve framing. Buy several acrylic frame boxes at The Container Store and hang the framed artwork around your house, in your basement, or in your child’s room. Your kids will appreciate the recognition they get when you go the extra mile to frame their art.

"Control Your Children's Clutter!!" »

Posted by Angie at 11:07 AM | Permalink

Reading to your child at a young age is one of the most effective tools for expanding his mind and instilling a lifelong love of learning. Reading a good book allows your child to travel to places she has never been, to meet people she has never met, and to develop an understanding of how to deal with a variety of physical and emotional situations.

Reading to your child also helps you develop an emotional connection. Whether you have her cuddle up in your lap, nestle with him while he is winding down for bed, or read to her while waiting for food in a restaurant, you are connecting. Reading to your child from an early age will also help him be successful in school. Reading out loud will help him learn language and become familiar with words. Reading is the foundation for developing an understanding of conceptual information and it sparks imagination!

Your child is never too young to be read to. Frankly, you should begin reading to your child while in the womb. During this time, use reading as a way of familiarizing the baby to your voice. If both parents take turns reading, it is even better. Imagine, before the baby is even born, the act of reading helps you connect and it can help parents reconnect with each other. When your child is born, the adventure begins. During the "easy" phase of infancy when your child is not physically able to explore his/her world, reading to your child helps him feel loved and comforted. Nestled in your arms with a favorite picture book, your baby will, at first, seem unaware of what is going on. But is she?

"The POWER of Reading" »

Posted by Angie at 02:54 PM | Permalink

The biggest trick some child predators’ are using these days is to pretend to be a kid, in a kid site chat room.

Child predators are talking the lingo, misspelling words, having simple conversations to gain trust with children on the internet.

But do you really know just how fast they can find information about your child or your family?

This is one website every parent must see:

http://www.usdoj.gov/criminal/ceos/index.html

Scroll down to the bottom and you will see a section called

Interactive Tools

Then click on the link

'What Can Be Revealed in Minutes About Your Child Online'

It is a downloadable tutorial that shows parents and kids just how someone can search for information about you or your child, if they frequent chat rooms, or send out any type of posts on the internet.

"Keeping Kids Safe on the Internet" »

Posted by Angie at 10:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Maintain Communication

Even though teens need to separate from their parents during adolescence, they also need to know that the safety net of home and family is always there for them. If the lines of communication are shut down, they are not yet capable of surviving emotionally; they need support and input. Let’s take a look at a few guidelines for keeping the lines of communication open between parents and teenagers.

1. Pay attention to the small things along with the significant things. If you are generally a good listener, your teen will be more likely to talk to you.

5. Expect your teen to change his mind frequently. Avoid commenting on the inconsistencies.

"How to Parent Your Teen Effectively" »

Posted by Angie at 11:25 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Every parent knows the calming effects on their baby of rocking and gentle motion. After all, who among us has not paced the floor at 2 am trying to entice a little one back to sleep by rocking, bouncing or swaying?

While you may not be able to do much about those late night pacing sessions, you can capitalise on your baby’s love of rhythmical movement to benefit both of you in many other ways as well. Instead of saving your dance sessions for the wee hours, why not make music and dancing a regular part of your routine with your baby?

Babies begin to develop rhythm skills very early on when they are consistently exposed to music and movement. In fact, it’s probably more accurate to say that babies are born with natural rhythm and all we need to do is nurture it. If you exposure your baby to the joys of dance throughout his childhood, just think how much more confident he'll feel as a teenager at his high school prom! In cultures where music and dance are a part of everyday life, no one grows up to be “rhythmically challenged!”

"Shared Dancing has Benefits for Babies and New Moms Alike" »

Posted by Angie at 11:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Music is a wonderful way for you to calm and soothe your baby, especially during the first year. How many times have your heard parents say that there was nothing that they could do with their crying, fussing baby until they tried music. This is because music does indeed soothe the savage beast, or in this case, the baby.

There are certain distinct sounds that have been proven to calm even fussy babies: the sounds of nature, white noise, and music. Even if your baby isn’t fussing or crying you may want to use music as often as you can to encourage that feeling of calm and peacefulness. All it takes is a few minutes every day and before you know it your baby will be looking forward to hearing that certain song emanating from the CD player.

There is nothing complicated or mysterious about introducing your baby to music from day one. You don’t need to search for the perfect song or a certain type of music. All you have to do is start by having your baby listen to your favorite songs and music. If jazz is on the top of your list, let your baby listen to the sounds of John Coltrane as he sits in his baby seat watching you in the kitchen. It doesn’t matter if you play the schmaltzy songs of the eighties or some wicked African beat, your baby is going to listen and his mood is going to be altered by any musical sound that he hears.

Besides the music that you yourself can introduce your baby to, there are hundreds of CDs on the market today that are filled with baby songs and lullabies. At the end of the day you may want to play a CD of quiet baby songs that have a slower beat. There are so many CDs for you to choose from that you will have a hard time making up your mind. Choose something that interests you. Many baby CDs will have lullabies and faster beat songs on the same CD.

"Using Music To Calm Your Baby" »

Posted by Angie at 11:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

This is the second article in a series I am writing about how to raise happy diabetic children. You can find the first article titled Help Your Child Develope Self-Confidence in our article archives.

Sometimes the phrase "happy diabetic kids" seems to be an oxymoron. Often it seems all of the dark powers of the diabetes universe are aligned against you. You wonder if there isn't some evil house elf behind the scenes just making everyone's life miserable on purpose. Not being graduates of Hogwarts School Of Magic we can't just wave a magic wand and make it all better. We must prepare for life with diabetes and we must prepare our children. Self-Reliance is a critical skill for diabetic children to master. Think of all of the responsibilities that go into daily diabetes care. We all realize that we must keep the responsibilities we put upon our children age appropriate. Non the less, in most school aged children the ability to take some responsibility for their own care goes a long way in giving them some feelings of control over their diabetes. Last month I mentioned there are three components to raising happy children. Self-Confidence, Self-Reliance and Self-Control. No I still haven't forgotten Self-Esteem we'll get there. I'm still of the opinion that with these first three components your child can't help but develope Self-Esteem.

"Raising Happy Diabetic Kids Part II" »

Posted by Angie at 11:58 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

All children are different and respond differently to divorce. Depending on the characteristics of the children - age, emotional maturity, happiness, resiliency to trauma - the easier or more difficult it will be for children to weather a divorce.

As a parent, you should know your children better than anyone...use your best judgment with your children during considering divorce. This "divorce and children" article is for parents who are certain that they would get a divorce if they didn't have children and want to decide what to think about regarding the effects a divorce would have on their children.

Children of divorced parents can actually live wonderful lives as long as the parents use proper judgment and create the right types of interactions between themselves and with each other.

This article on this web page does not suggest that divorce is the correct course of action for you and it in no way should be taken as a form of counseling to you. This article is merely to spark you to think logically and then make your own decision about divorce and your children.

As previously stated, every child is different and subsequently, every child responds to divorce in a different way.

"Divorce and Children: Things To Consider When You're Staying Married Only For Your Children" »

Posted by Angie at 11:16 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)