So, how do you improve communication with your child? Try the following:

Start with active listening. With active listening, you listen for the meaning in your child's words, and you check with your child to make sure that you have correctly heard and understood their meaning. The big goal is to improve mutual understanding. So, use affirming statements, acknowledge what they had to say, and make sure you understood them correctly.

Next, pay attention to body language. The way your child talks is not always as important as the way their body expresses them. When communicating with your child, listen to their words, but also to their emotions and feelings. Then, do your best to describe the underlying emotion. For example, say, "You seem angry" or, "It appears you are frustrated." By showing your child that you are understanding their feelings, you validate them, and help them work through them.

Relate to the child. At every stage of life your child is going to express things differently. For example, your toddler may not understand a word like "frustration", however, they may understand a statement like, "Does this make you want to throw a toy, hit a person, or stomp your feet?" If your child is not understanding you, try a different approach for describing what they are feeling, or what you are observing.

Respond, don't react. The fact is that naturally we judge and jump to reactions, however, to improve communication, and improve your relationship with your child, it is essential that you gain some control of your emotion and learn to respond rather than react. Give yourself enough time to recognize an appropriate response so that you can give it. If you do not give yourself enough time, you basically tell your child that their feelings and opinions are not valid, and that what you think is all that matters. This is not smart. Instead, start a conversation about it, an open dialogue that allows you to explore your feelings, and theirs.

Focus. Have you ever tried to have a conversation with someone engrossed in a television show, a book, or anything else? Well, it is important that you are not that person, and your child is not the person trying to converse. Give your child your undivided attention. Turn the tv off, stop working, stop cleaning, instead, give them the moment they need.

Validate feelings. People are entitled to have feelings, your child is no different, so don't discourage your child from feeling upset, angry, or frustrated, instead discourage them from reacting to them by hitting, yelling, etc. Help them find more constructive ways to explore these feelings and relieve yourself of them.

If you can do your best to practice these communication tactics with your child, they will feel better about themselves, and in turn respect themselves and you more.