Build your self-esteem. Confidence is something you build over time. You have to learn about yourself, and like yourself, and as you work to do these things, your esteem will rise, and your confidence will rise with it. So, how do you build self esteem? It is a process, but the first thing you can do is start with a daily affirmation of your worth and value. You can then start to uncover your talents, and develop them. Usually, people who work to grow their talents will feel a confidence in themselves and their abilities. We all have insecurities, but as we expand our capabilities, they tend to shrink. So, work on yourself, your talents, and your thoughts, and practice confidence throughout the day, each day.

Fake it until you make it. While it is a cliché, it is a good idea when trying to use high self esteem as an attractive quality to fake it until you make it. Just be careful that you do not over do it. Confident people do not tear others down. They do not act ridiculously to get the lime light, and they do not need approval of others. So, practice these attributes when you are with people, and fake the high esteem, and confidence until you do not have to fake any longer because you really feel that way about yourself. You will be surprised to find that sometimes, just acting as if you are confident can lead to positive thought processes that lead to actual confidence.

Recognize what it takes to be confident, and why you like it so that you can exhibit the same characteristics. If you have ever been at a party, or in a crowd, you are sure to know that the people with high self esteem, and an aura of confidence are the people that are usually surrounded by others, and are thought to be the most attractive. Why do you think that is? What attributes make them so desirable? What can you do differently in your life to exhibit those same characteristics? Observation is a powerful learning tool, so observe and recognize the skill of confidence, and put it into practice yourself.

The confidence and esteem thing can be a viscous cycle when it comes to dating and relationships. If you don't have it, you become less attractive, and as a result, less confident. If you do, you become more so. So, to break out of this cycle if you are on the unconfident end of things, you have to do the above tips, faking it, practicing it, and learning to be a better you.