How do I get noticed?
Question: I have had a crush on someone I see almost daily at school for a year now, but they do not know I exist. I have talked to them a few times, and been in a study group with them before, but to no avail. I worry that they will never notice me. Should I just ask them out, or should I wait for them to notice me? If I should wait, then how can I get them to notice me?
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Answer: If you aren't getting noticed, and it has been a year, either they noticed you and aren't interested, or you are doing something (or not doing something) that is making you invisible. So put a stop to being invisible, and if they don't act, move forward.
Getting noticed usually happens when you have confidence, and look your best. In addition, you may have to do something to engage their attention.
So, before you ask them out, make sure that it is not the first case, where they did notice you, and were not interested. Make a point of talking to them each day this week. Make sure you look good. Make sure you say something memorable, or funny. Get their attention, so that you can know that it is not a matter of overlooking you. The way to get noticed is to be worthy of notice. Who are the people you notice? Why? Now duplicate those things the best you can, whether it is dressing well, making insightful comments in a class discussion, or just being attractive in general.
Send some hints to them that you are interested in them. You may need to brush up on your flirting. But make it clear that you are interested in an invitation to go out some time. They may or may not act on it.
If they talk to you in return, or act favorable toward you, then go ahead and ask them out. We live in an equality world now, where girls do not have to wait on the guy to ask them out, if they are interested, they have the power to ask them. Just be careful you do not come on too strong. Maybe ask them to study first. You are in a class together, so this is less awkward, and gives you additional time to determine if they would be interested in you romantically. If you aren't interested in that, then at least ask them out to do something low pressure, like hang out in a group, or get a cup of coffee.
If that doesn't work, then quit wasting your time on this person. The fact is, a year is a long time to go after someone who is not interested in you. So, move on, and you may find that once you are no longer obsessed with the person, they may actually find interest in you.
