The first thing to realize about a situation where feelings have been hurt is that you will not be able to mend upset feelings unless you want to. Often friends try to make up but they still feel much of the anger that drove them apart. Although you might still feel anger toward your friends, you need to get to the point where a need for reconciliation and friendship overcomes your anger. This might be when you realize that friendship is simply worth more than being angry or correct. Often regret is a motivating factor in the reunion of old friends driven apart by anger. Whatever your motivation, it needs to be strong enough to overcome anger. Friendships cannot be mended if anger is the primary emotion involved.

If the other party in the friendship is not willing to apologize you will need to do so first. This requires some humility, but it is well worth the effort in the long run. Even if you feel that the other person was wrong, you will probably have to be the one to make a conciliatory gesture. Remember that mending hurt feelings doesn't mean that you need to admit that you were wrong when the other person was clearly at fault. You need to apologize for your part of the problem and express a desire to be friends. If your friend is unwilling to reconcile after this you know that the friendship will probably never work.

Another very important part of the process is building new positive memories. You might not be able to get over all of the bad feelings about the past but you can create a new future. Find ways to spend time together that do not recall unpleasant past experiences. Do something that is simply enjoyable such as going to a movie or spending time with a large group of friends. Eventually you might be able to talk about more specific feelings from the past, but initially you should avoid too much discussion.

Try to use other mutual friends in the healing process. A mutual friend can help you to remember why you became friends in the first place. They can also serve as a partially neutral mediator. It can be good to have an outside source of information in such an emotional situation.

If your attempts at healing don't work at first do not give up. It can take years for old friendships to be fully restored. There might be some blow ups or arguments but don't let this discourage you. If you both have a desire to be friends again then you will be. If the problem seems particularly severe you might want to see a psychologist with your friend present. A trained professional should be able to help you to understand the dynamic that is driving you apart.