Lying in relationships, the damage it does
Half-truth, little white lie, fib, falsehood, bend the truth, and bluff. These are just a few of the many names for one of the most damaging things that can occur in any type of relationship. Here is an overview of the damage lies can have on a relationship.
Lying about self can cause the relationship to be built on a faulty foundation
When people tell lies about themselves to new acquaintances in an effort to impress them, they may succeed. However, over time it is more than likely that those lies will be uncovered. For the person that has lied, the time before a lie is uncovered could be torture for a couple of reasons. First, if the relationship grows into anything significant, the person that has lied will want their new friend to know who they really are. Second, the liar will constantly live in fear that their new friend will discover the truth and the relationship will be destroyed.
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Lying won't fix the problem (cont. destructive behavior)
Telling a lie may cover up the immediate situation, but the underlying behavior and the actual event will still be there. Just because a person was able to cover up a problem by lying about it, it doesn't fix the situation. The problem will still need to be taken care of. Whether it is a problem at work, a social problem, or a problem with the person it does not go away when a person lies about it. In fact, lying about it can make it worse. If a person lies to their significant other about where he/she was when they arrive home late from work, and they were actually cheating on their partner, this lie will only serve as a cover until the event happens again. The person is lying to try to save their relationship, but is continuing the action which can eventually end the relationship for good.
One lie turns into another until a person can never go back
Often the first lie is almost like a reflex told in the spur of the moment. However, once a person lies, especially if it is a lie to cover something significant up, that person will most likely have to continue to lie to cover up the original lie. The longer the person continues to lie, the more damaging the effects will be when the truth finally comes to light and the harder it will be to bring oneself to tell the truth. It is best if a person is able to come clean or correct their lie as soon as possible to prevent seriously injuring a relationship.
Trust may never be completely given again
Another thing that can be lost in a relationship where lies have prevailed is trust. Once a person has lied and the other person is aware of the lie, it can be hard to ever believe the "liar" again. If the relationship happens to be between a boss and their subordinate, it could be very damaging to the subordinate's career. If the subordinate has lied to their boss because they may never be chosen for the important projects that will lead to promotion, or they could be fired right away. However, working relationships are not the only type that could be damaged by a lie. Trust is necessary no matter what kind of relationship it is, and losing that trust can be devastating to future of a relationship.
