Making Your Spouse Your Best Friend
When you get married you promise to cherish each other, to care for each other, and to share each other's money. But do you promise to be best friends with each other? Unfortunately many people marry when they are not friends. They might like one another but there is nothing that guarantees friendship in marriage. With all the stresses and strains of life many couples who started out as friends find themselves fighting. It is probably true of even the best marriages that they experience periods of severe difficulty that push couples away from friendship. Many couples are just trying to get through the day; being best friends is not the top priority when you are just trying to get by. If you wake up one morning to find that your spouse is no longer your best friend you need to make some changes. Do not be alarmed but do not be complascent either. Listed bellow are some tips that should help you to make your spouse your best friend again or to make your spouse a best friend for the first time.
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Like any friendship, the one you form with your spouse requires time and energy. Every friendship is built on quality time and mutual interest. Look for the things you share in common with your spouse and spend time pursuing them. This could be fine dining, dancing, games, sports, etc. Plan on at least one date night a week but don't forget that frienships are built on more than formal events. A date will help you with your love life but it won't make you best friends. You need to laugh with each other and do the sorts of things that friends do. Discuss the things that excite you and interest you.
Do something fun with each other each day. If you set aside a little time for friendship you will find it much easier to become best friends again. Do something light hearted during this time. It could also be very important to figure out some sort of long term activity. This could be reading a book together or training for an athletic event. Any shared experience will give you things to talk about and to focus on together. Sit down with your spouse and consider various options based on your mutual interests. Also trying something new can be a great way to jump start your friendship.
Another very important part of making your spouse your best friend is to avoid the sorts of things that cause arguments. No doubt you and your spouse worry about money, your children, and your home or apartment. You probably find plenty of things to fight about or to blame each other for. Consider the problems that are afflicting your relationship and look for ways to lessen the stress. You will find that just decreasing stress can help you to become much better friends. If you have children, make sure that you take a break from the kids at least once a week.
Utillizing these methods you can help to build a lasting friendship with your spouse. Over the years you will treasure this friendship; the simple truth is that marriages founded on friendship produce lasting joy. Remember that you got married because you loved someone, and you probably loved them because you have something in common. This commonality is what you can build on to form a lasting friendship. It will take some time and patience to restore your friendship, but it will be well worth your while.
