Trust is a two-way street. You want to be able to trust your children, but your children won't be trustworthy if you aren't. There are several keys to building trust with your children. The first key is that you must follow through on your promises. If you tell your toddler you'll take them outside to play after their nap, you better do it, even if they don't remember, because eventually they will. If you tell your eight-year old that on Saturday you'll take him to the movies, you better make it a priority. If you tell your teenager you'll be at her soccer game, you better be there on time and cheering as loudly as you can. Think about your adult relationships. Are you really friends with the guy that says he'll do something but never really follows through? How can you expect your kids to be friends with you if you don't follow through on your promises?

The second key to building trust with your kids is to treat them with respect. Your kids have opinions, ideas, and dreams. Allow them time to tell you about them, don't judge, and treat them with the same respect you would a business partner who is presenting you with a new opportunity. Compliment them on good behavior and give them honest, reliable feedback when they ask for it. Your kids may not be adults, but they should be treated with every ounce of respect you would show your adult friends. You can't expect them to respect you are keep your rules of you don't show them the same respect.

The third key to building a trusting relationship with your children is to enforce household rules and consequences. Start with simple rules when your children are young and just beginning to understand. If you tell you toddler to stop pounding on the wall, tell them what the consequence will be if they don't stop ("or else I'll take away your truck") and then follow through with the consequence if they make the choice to continue the behavior. When your children get a little older, sit down in a family meeting and discuss family rules and get your children's input. If your child contributes to the making of a rule, they are more likely to follow it. When a child breaks a rule, no matter how old they are, you must enforce the consequences. They key to building the trust is to make sure they know the consequences before the rule is broken and that you follow through on enforcement. Allow your children to set rules for you too. They could be things like, if dad misses a track meet, he has to take all the kids out to the movies, and if he is late to a track meet, he has to buy ice cream for all the runners. If you don't follow through on a promise or break a rule, make sure there is a set