Rebound time!
After you have a nasty break-up like a divorce, you may find yourself in the position on needing a person to rebound with. Quite often the rebound person is just a temporary fix to make you feel good after you lose your spouse. When it comes to rebound relationships, you need to be careful. Since you are just getting out of a long-term relationship, it is wise to take your time before entering another one. When you hit the rebound time stage, you could be making a big mistake by finding a person that you assume you care about or using this person to make your ex lover jealous.
Rebound relationships normally leave you confused. Instead of just jumping into the dating field, take a few weeks or months to find out where you want to go from here. Find out what you want in life. What do you want for yourself and your children if you have any? If you just rush into the dating field and jump right into the rebound relationship, you won't be helping yourself at all. Instead you are living on an illusion that you are loved and cared for again. While this new person may be a great person, they are not your ex and rushing into a relationship isn't going to hurt your ex or cause them to come crawling back to you.
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Rebound relationships rarely work out, leaving you with a couple months of fun and confusion. After a marriage ends, you are often left as an emotional wreck. You need to sort out who you are and get your emotions back in order before you place that burden onto a new boyfriend or girlfriend. Save yourself the time of jumping into the rebound relationship and go to therapy instead. Figure out who you are and what you want to do so you can figure out how to move forward from here.
If you jump into a rebound relationship and you give your heart to this person quickly, you run the risk of getting hurt. Since your emotions are still up and down, this person may only want to stick around when you are bubbly and happy. They don't want to see you crying your eyes out because you got the divorce papers in the mail. It is better to get your past relationship behind you before you move on. Hanging onto the past relationship and bringing it into a new one will place a big burden on the new relationship and it will most likely crumble.
Go away and just be by yourself for awhile. You need to take some time to just be miserable for a few days so it can get out of your system and you can look toward the future with hope and anticipation. Bringing a new person into your life at this stage will either leave you distraught again or it will leave them distraught.
A great way to get past the feelings you have for your former lover is to take up a new hobby or talent. Do something you have always wanted to try like skydiving or karate lessons. Focus on your mind on something different besides your failed marriage.
Once you reach the point where you are ready to date, take time to actually get to know a person before you just jump into a relationship with them. Become friends with this person first because it will be much easier for you to have a strong foundation to build a new relationship upon when you are ready for it and you can trust and love again.
