One key sign of an abusive relationship is that the abusive person will constantly criticize and put down the other person. This criticism will come in the form of jokes that are put downs or comments that humiliate and embarrass. These things tend to break down a person's self esteem and allow the abusive person to have more control and authority. A relationship should never lower a person's perception of themselves.

Controlling

Another sign of an abusive relationship is that one person controls the other. An abuser demeans, humiliates, and criticizes his or her victim so as to have more power and control over them. They will tell them when they can go somewhere or when they can't. They will control how money is spent. They will control what a person wears, how they do their hair, how they act, etc. An abusive person may call the victim frequently and be angry when they don't know where the person is.

Jealousy

A very prominent sign of an abusive relationship is extreme jealousy. An abuser will constantly accuse the victim of flirting with, talking to, and making eyes at other people. They will be jealous of friends or associates of the opposite gender. They will be suspicious of any new acquaintances and will repeatedly call to check up on the victim when they are out with other people. The abuser may even tell the victim what they can and cannot wear because they will be jealous of other people noticing the victim.

Isolation

An abuser tries very hard to keep the victim isolated. This is usually because he or she doesn't want the victim confiding in someone else. They will attempt to keep the person away from social activities, especially if the abuser cannot go. An abusive person will try to limit the number of friends that his or her victim has and will monopolize all of the victim's time so they can't do anything without the abuser. The victim may have a hard time making regular phone calls to family and friends. This lack of communication and distance will progressively grow as the abuse grows.

Emotions

The emotional situation of an abusive person is another key element for recognizing signs of an abusive relationship. An abusive person often has a short temper, and can become overly angry at seemingly insignificant problems. They will fly off the handle if their food isn't prepared properly or if someone cuts them off in traffic. Often an abusive person will blame his or her emotional status or instability on the victim. The victim is blamed for a bad temper or episode. The victim usually begins to believe that he or she is really the cause of an abusive person's temper and will make excuses for violent actions.

History

One of the best ways to avoid an abusive situation or to recognize an abusive situation is to know the history of the potential abuser. Does this person have problems with drug or alcohol abuse? Has this person been arrested for assault? Has this person been arrested for domestic dispute issues? Knowing the background of a person is a very important element in spotting abusive situations or the potential for such a situation.

Pay attention to and recognize these signs of an abusive relationship to protect family and friends. If you suspect a case of abuse or if you are in an abusive situation seek help immediately.