Nosey: In-laws can be nosey. They want to know everything about you, your past, your future, your relationship with their child. They want to know what birth control you are using. They want to know what changes you are going to make to their child's life, home, career, schooling, etc. The trouble with some in-laws is that they still want to parent their child, and now you as well. They think that because they brought your spouse into the world, they have the right to know everything about their life. The fact is, to a degree they are right. Parents should be involved, and informed, but they should also respect your privacy, and what you choose to share with them and when.

Bossy: Some in-laws feel it is their right and their place to tell you how to live, how to eat, how to exercise, how to raise children, how to care for your home, your car, your finances, etc. Bossy in-laws can be extremely trying on your patience, especially if their views differ from your own. For example, you might think spanking children is unacceptable, so to have your in-laws tell you that you should be spanking your kids, can be difficult. They should be able to offer you their opinion, and you should be respectful and open minded, but it is your life, live it how you see fit.

Not accepting: Sometimes your in-laws are simply not going to accept you. This can be difficult. They may not think you are good enough for their child. They may not appreciate your race, culture, religion, or background. They may simply dislike you because you are not who they chose for their child. This is difficult, but you should not have to beg for acceptance. So, let them have the problem, and do your best not to judge them or be un-accepting of them.

Too-involved: Some in-laws are too hands on. They want to be part of your every decision, and offer their advice at every turn. They visit often, they have a finger in every one of your pots, and you start to feel like you live with them, and that they run your life.

Not-involved: This is when you want them to take an interest in your life and your marriage, and your family, or children, etc. and they simply do not care one way or the other. It is when they accept invitations when they are extended, but make no efforts otherwise.

So, what can you do about the trouble with in-laws? You can ride it out. You can let your in-laws know where you stand, and what you feel is acceptable behavior from them and from you, and treat them with the respect and kindness they deserve as the parents of your spouse. You live your own life, and allow them to live theirs. Ask for respect, acceptance, and the right degree of involvement, and stand united with your spouse until you get it.