What your wife really means when she says (fill in the blank)
Women can be somewhat cryptic when it comes to speech. A lot of times they say one things and mean something completely different. The following are nine commonly uttered phrases your wife will use, and the actual meaning behind them:
Fine: Basically there are a few ways this can be said, and the tone indicates the meaning. If you ask how she is, and she responds "fine" in a chipper voice, she probably is. But if she mumbles it, or says it sourly it means that she is mad and doesn't want to waste time talking about it because you won't understand, or she wants you to figure it out on your own. This is also the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up. So look at the context of the use to derive meaning.
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Five minutes: Ok, sometimes a women will use the phrase five minutes, it is a popular increment of time. However, this too has double meaning. If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. However, five minutes is exactly five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to finish something, or to watch the game before helping around the house, etc.
Nothing: If you ask her something and her response is nothing, and you did not ask, "What did you buy today?" then you better be careful. Usually nothing means something is bugging her, and she is not ready to talk about it. However, it is something that indicates you should be on your toes. It is important to recognize that arguments that begin with nothing usually end in "fine."
Go ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it! If you want to do something and she does not look pleased and says "go ahead" then it is a test. What or who do you love more? If she wants a night in, and you want to go play basket ball with the boys and ask her if you can and she says "go ahead" that means she is secretly mad. Stick around.
Loud sigh: This is a word even if it does not seem like one. It is often misunderstood. It means that she feels like what she is doing arguing with you is a waste of time, and why argue about "nothing"?
That's okay: If you apologize for screwing up and this is the response you get, watch out. It usually means that it is far from ok, but she has not yet made up her mind how you will pay for what you did. So, watch out!
Thanks: Unless it comes out really sarcastically it means "thank you" so quit thinking there is more to it, or less to it than that. Just be happy and polite.
Whatever: This is usually pretty cut and dry and is a women's way of saying F@!#YOU! When she says this you should probably pick up flowers.
Don't worry about it, I got it: This means she is beyond upset, and hates that she is doing something she has asked you to do a million times. However, when she says this, that does not mean literally don't worry, it means get off your lazy butt and do it right now, no matter what. If you literally do not worry then usually you will end up having to ask her "What's wrong?" And she will likely respond with "nothing".
If you can just remember what these women vocab words really mean you can spare yourself a whole lot of arguments.
